Misfortune Cookies

A little over a year ago, I saw someone on TV makes some homemade fortune cookies. I thought this would be a really cool idea for something to bring into work on Valentine's Day. However, I wanted to do it with a twist. I wanted to make misfortune cookies. 

I went online to find a homemade fortune cookie recipe. I wasn't shocked to find out that my misfortune idea was by no means original. However, I was pleasantly surprised to find that one of my favorite food bloggers, Ms. Humble, had already made some misfortune cookies. I decided to go with her recipe.

The cookies were a bit of work, but they turned out well. The only problem was that I had burned  the tips of every single one of my fingers trying to shape the things. I finally had to call in Katie with her famous asbestos hands* to help. 

This Valentine's Day, I wanted to try the misfortune cookies again to hand out at work. However, I found a different recipe that requires a lower oven temperature. I thought maybe I could avoid any third degree burns this time. The cookies had to bake double the time, but my fingers didn't mind.

For the misfortunes, I sent a message to Jeff, a friend of mine, through Facebook. He's one of those that posts completely hysterical and witty status updates, so I thought he could come up with some really good misfortunes for me. And, I was right. Within an hour, I had about twenty new ones to add to my list.

Once again, the misfortune cookies were a big hit at work. I received lots of compliments on the taste. Almost everyone also loved the misfortunes and had a good laugh. However, I admit there were a couple that from the looks on their faces seemed not to appreciate the humor. Oh well... I still think I want to do it again next year and possibly make it a yearly tradition. I'd even like to experiment with different kinds of flavorings and try dipping them partially in chocolate with sprinkles, crushed candies, etc.

*This may be even more proof that Katie is a vampire. I'm not sure. We already know that her skin is pale (alabaster as she calls it), she's a complete insomniac, she loves her meat rare, and her special power is that she can find anything anywhere ("Hey Mom, where are my shoes?" "Have you seen my keys?") Some may think this is just a little family joke, but I am beginning to wonder.

Below is a list of the misfortunes I used. If you can think of one to add to the list, please let me know for next year. (Disclaimer: Several of the misfortunes were found online. However, I found the same ones in several places, so I have no idea who came up with them first and whom to credit.)

1. SHAME ON YOU FOR THINKING A COOKIE IS PSYCHIC.
2. YOU NEED A MINT. LIKE, BAD.
3. SOMEONE AHEAD OF YOU IN LINE WILL PAY WITH A CHECK.
4. ERROR 404: FORTUNE NOT FOUND.
5. THIS COOKIE FELL ON THE GROUND.
6. PIGEON POOP BURNS THE RETINA FOR 13 HOURS. YOU WILL LEARN THIS THE HARD WAY.
7. YOU ARE FAR FROM LAZY. YOU PUT IN A HARD DAY’S WORK…EVERY WEEK.
8. AT THE RATE YOU GIVE PEOPLE HEADACHES, YOU SHOULD BUY STOCK IN EXCEDRIN.
9. AVOID LARGE, HEAVY OBJECTS TRAVELING AT A HIGH RATE OF SPEED.
10. IF YOU LIVE A LONG LIFE, IT WILL BE A REMARKABLE TESTAMENT TO YOUR FRIENDS’ AND RELATIVES’ SELF CONTROL.
11. I’M WATCHING YOU. YOU CAN’T ESCAPE.
12. ARE YOU WEARING THAT OUTFIT JUST TO BE FUNNY?
13. YOU WILL DIE ALONE AND POORLY DRESSED.
14. YOUR FRIENDS REALLY DON’T LIKE YOU.
15. LOCK YOUR DOOR AND NEVER LEAVE THE HOUSE AGAIN.
16. IF AT FIRST YOU DON’T SUCCEED, NOBODY WILL BE SURPRISED.
17. EVERYONE IS LAUGHING AT YOU BEHIND YOUR BACK.
18. THE END IS NEAR AND IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT.
19. IF YOU READ THIS, YOU WILL DIE.
20. IN TIME, YOU WILL OFFEND EVERYONE YOU KNOW.
21. WHEN YOU’RE CLOSE TO THE BOTTOM, YOU DON’T HAVE FAR TO FALL.
22. YOU WILL FIND HAPPINESS, THEN QUICKLY MISPLACE IT.
23. CHOOSE THE PATH OF LEAST RESISTANCE. THAT’S ALL YOU CAN HANDLE.
24. THE FORTUNE YOU SEEK IS IN ANOTHER COOKIE.
25. A MISPLACED COMMA WILL COME BACK TO HAUNT YOU.
26. YOUR DECISION TO STUDY THE HUMANITIES WAS A WISE CAREER DECISION. IT HAS LET TO AMAZING ART CHOICES FOR YOUR CUBICLE.
27. DON’T COUNT YOUR CHICKENS BEFORE THEY HATCH. YOU’LL BE SO DISAPPOINTED WHEN YOU FIND OUT THAT SOMEONE HARD-BOILED THE EGGS.
28. ACT AS IF IT WERE IMPOSSIBLE TO FAIL. PRETEND THAT YOU DON’T SEE PEOPLE LAUGHING AT YOUR FAILURE.
29. A SPOONFUL OF SUGAR HELPS THE MEDICINE GO DOWN. A SPOONFUL OF IPECAC HELPS THE MEDICINE AND THE SUGAR COME BACK UP.
30. YOUR FINANCIAL SITUATION WILL SOON BE IMPROVING, WHICH ISN’T NECESSARILY SAYING MUCH.
31. SO SORRY THAT YOU MISUNDERSTOOD. DOWNSIZING HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOUR WAIST SIZE.
32. YOUTH IS WASTED ON THE YOUNG, BUT NOT ON YOU.YOU REALLY APPRECIATE SEEING IT IN OTHERS.
33. YOU SHOULD BE GRATEFUL YOU WEREN’T A CHILD STAR. THEIR LIVES ARE MORE MESSED UP THAN YOURS.
34. YOU DON’T LOOK AS GOOD AS YOUNG ELVIS, BUT YOU DON’T LOOK AS BAD AS OLD ELVIS.
35. BE GLAD YOU’RE NOT BETTY WHITE. THE GOLDEN GIRLS HAVEN’T FARED WELL OVER THE PAST FEW YEARS.
36. SOMEONE SHOULD WRITE A SONG ABOUT YOUR LOVELIFE. WAIT, ADELE ALREADY DID.
37. IF YOU ADD “IN BED” TO THE END OF THIS FORTUNE, YOU WILL BE CURSED.
38. USE YOUR CHARM AND PERSONALITY TO OBTAIN YOUR WISHES. IT MAY OR MAY NOT WORK.
39. IF YOU ATE THE COOKIE BEFORE YOU READ THIS, IT WAS POISONOUS. IF NOT, JUST KIDDING…GO AHEAD AND EAT THE COOKIE. NO, SERIOUSLY, EAT THE COOKIE.
40. TASTES LIKE CHICKEN MEANS IT’S NOT CHICKEN.
41. THE CLOSEST YOU’LL COME TO EXPERIENCING GLEE IS TUESDAY NIGHTS ON FOX.
42. THINK BEFORE YOU EAT. FOR EXAMPLE, “WHAT DID THAT FORTUNE COOKIE EVER DO TO ME?”
43. THE SENTENCE YOU PLAGIARIZED IN THE 11TH GRADE WILL BE YOUR DOWNFALL.
44. WHEN PEOPLE TELL YOU YOU’RE HOT, THEY MEANT YOU’RE NOT SMART.
45. THAT CARLY SIMON SONG WAS ABOUT YOU.
46. LEARN FROM THE BRADY BUNCH OR YOU ARE DOOMED TO RELIVE THE TIKI DOLL PART OF THE HAWAII SPECIAL.
47. EVERY PERSON IS THE ARCHITECT OF HIS/HER OWN FORTUNE. YOU SPECIALIZE IN SAND CASTLES TOO CLOSE TO THE WATER’S EDGE.
48. YOUR FORTUNE IS, “COME ON, GET HAPPY.” THAT BAD NEWS? YOUR FORTUNE EXPIRED IN 1974 WHEN THE PARTRIDGE FAMILY GOT CANCELED.
49. YOU WILL FIND A SMALL PIECE OF PAPER TODAY IN YOUR COOKIE.
50. HELP! I’M STUCK INSIDE A FORTUNE COOKIE FACTORY.

Chocolate Truffle Cheesecake

A coworker had six packages of cream cheese just taking up space in her refrigerator. Imagine?! That would be inconceivable at my house. So, she gave the cream cheese to me knowing full well I could put them to good use.

I clipped a recipe fifteen years ago for a Chocolate Truffle Cheesecake. I thought it was finally time to give it a try. I had enough cream cheese to make two cakes. And not only did we have house guests to bake for, there was another birthday at work.

Remember this joker? Well, it WAS actually and truly his birthday this time.

Here's Richard, one year older and wiser, with his Chocolate Truffle Cheesecake. Sorry, I didn't get a close up photo of a slice. I was pretty messy with my cutting.

Still, Richard, I advise you watch your back come April 1.

If you love cheesecake and are slightly addicted to chocolate like I am, this recipe is perfect for you. It's very easy to make, and it was a big hit at work and at home. Even my two boys, who are rather picky when it comes to cheesecake, devoured this one.

Plus, I just realized that Valentine's Day is only three days away. I just maybe making this again!

Austrian Drum Torte

As I thumbed through a cookbook we got for Christmas, the word "Austrian" immediately caught my eye. You see, Katie, the kids and I spent the summer in Vienna directing a study abroad program. I looked at the incredible photo for the Austrian Drum Torte and read the recipe. Although it would probably be one of those very involved all day affairs, I knew I had to make it, and I knew who I had to make it for. One of my student employees, Rachel, was having a birthday, and she also went on the study abroad with us.

Here I am with some of our students at Schönbrunn Palace in Vienna. Rachel is on the left.

During my time in Austria, I had never seen nor heard of Austrian Drum Torte, but I didn't really care if this recipe was authentic Austrian because the photo in the cookbook looked so cool. However, I did do a little investigation online and found out there is really such a thing, but there seems to be a little confusion. I guess the cake is actually Hungarian and called a Dobos Torte. Dobos means "like a drum" in Hungarian. I thought the cake didn't look much like a drum, but after a little more research, I found the cake was named after its creator, Jozsef Dobos, a Hungarian pastry chef. He created the cake in 1884, and Emperor Franz Joseph and Empress Sissi were two of the first to try it. Since Hungary was at the time part of the Austro-Hungarian empire, I think it's OK if Austria claims the cake, too.

Here's the finished product. Pretty amazing, isn't it. And really, it wasn't hard at all. It's just time consuming. But, I was able to multitask and get a lot of other things done while creating this work of art.

Wunderbar!

When I brought the cake to the office, it was a definite showstopper. And of course, it tastes every bit as good as it looks. I can't wait for the next special occasion to make it again.

Herzlichen Glückwunsch zum Geburtstag, Rachel!

Making this cake made me wish there were more time in a lifetime to learn several different professions. Training as a pastry chef in Vienna would be on my list. So many wonderful cafés, so many wonderful desserts! If you are wondering which café is my favorite, here are some photos of a little outing Tomas and I took to Café Central. That place is a—ma—zing! I had the Café Central Torte and Tomas had the Schokozauber (chocolate magic).  Tomas still talks about how he ate a piece of cake with real gold flecks on it.

Yep, I want to run a café like this.

Elvis Presley Lamingtons

It's Lamington time again!

And for those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, it's when Mr. P. hosts the Reinvent the Lamington Contest on his blog Delicious, Delicious, Delicious. Lamingtons are an Australian dessert consisting of squares of cake with a jam filling covered in chocolate and shredded coconut. Last year, I submitted three entries. You can check them out here and here. My S'Mores Lamingtons actually placed 2nd.

This year, I had the greatest of plans. It was going to be a veritable Lamington extravaganza. I had ideas for at least four different Lamington creations. But alas, I procrastinated, and then life just got in the way. To illustrate—the reason I'm typing this at 10 p.m. just two hours before the deadline is that I spent the entire evening involved with the Cub Scout Pinewood Derby. (Yes, I am Master o' the Cubs.) Unfortunately, only one of my ideas made it to fruition. It's sad, I know, but at least I've got some ideas ready to go for next year if Mr. P decides to once again hold the competition.

So without further ado, I give you (drum roll please)...

the ELVIS PRESLEY LAMINGTON!

My inspiration for this Lamington was Elvis' favorite sandwich, which contains three of my favorite flavors together in one—peanut butter, banana, and bacon. 

Now wait!

Just stop right there, and wipe that look of disgust off your face.

Do NOT knock it till you've tried it.

You're probably thinking, "Hmm. Banana and peanut butter—I'm OK with that. But bacon? No way. That's too weird!" Well, just think of it this way. You know how adding sea salt to sweet desserts like caramels and brownies is all the rage? (If you didn't know that, just trust me. It is.) The bacon is just a little bit of salty goodness that balances out the sweetness and adds an interesting smokiness.

For these Lamingtons, I made a banana pound cake for the cake part. The filling is a peanut butter frosting. I then dipped the squares in chocolate and sprinkled bacon pieces on top.

In my opinion, Elvis was really onto something, and these Elvis inspired Lamingtons turned out really well. I brought them into work to use my students and coworkers as guinea pigs. I admit I got some skeptical looks, but everyone gave the Lamingtons a fair chance. In the end, everyone liked them. Most were pleasantly surprised.

I found the Elvis Lamingtons quite addicting. I ended up eating too many of them, which is not good. I'd better be careful, or I'm starting to look like Elvis in his later years.

Oh, and by the way, this banana pound cake recipe is fantastic by itself.

If you're wondering what the Kewpie doll is doing in the photo, it was my 2nd place prize for last year's Lamington contest. A little strange, I know, but still fun. It comes from Japan and arrived in a sealed box where you don't know what kind of Kewpie is inside—kind of like Cracker Jacks or Kinder eggs. I got the deer Kewpie from the animal collection. Kewpie dolls and other assorted figurines show up in Mr. P's blog posts, so I thought I'd include mine in the photo as a shout out to Mr. P to say thanks for holding the competition. It was a lot of fun coming up with these Lamingtons.

So, with 10 minutes to go till midnight. I'm going to hit the publish button and go to bed.

Good night.

Nauvoo Gingerbread Cookies

Here is another recipe I made over the Christmas holidays. It comes from the Scovil Bakery in Nauvoo, IL, which was originally built in the 1840's by Mormon pioneers. If you tour the rebuilt bakery, you will be rewarded at the end with samples of their world famous gingerbread cookies.

Truth be told, I have never been a fan of gingerbread. The gingerbread cookies I've tried have always been hard and over-spiced for my taste. However, this recipe is the exact opposite. The cookies are nice and soft, and the flavor is perfect. In fact, I have fallen in love with this recipe and think it makes the best gingerbread cookies on the planet. Not only do they freeze well, but they seem to even get better after they've been in the freezer for a while. 

This past Christmas, I made batch after batch for parties and to give to neighbors. As proof of the wonderfulness of these cookies, I've been asked for the recipe multiple times. Here are some Y cookies I made for a student party at work.

Go Cougars!

I also used this recipe for our annual Gingerbread House Extravaganza we celebrate with some friends. This may be one case where a hard-as-rock gingerbread recipe might work better. Or, I would at least advise baking the house pieces a little longer. We had a few problems this year, but we didn't mind eating the broken pieces. And, I was pretty impressed with our creation.

Our gingerbread house masterpiece

And now, for the big finale! After the holidays were over, we wondered what to do with our house. No one was really interested in eating it. As good as this recipe is, it does not stay nice and soft after sitting out as a Christmas decoration for almost a month. Here is what we came up with. It's now our new family holiday tradition.


Take a look.

Candied Orange Peel

Yes, I'm still playing catch up. I think I have a backlog of about five recipes waiting to be written up and posted. Since the pace of life recently has returned somewhat to normal, I have high hopes. But please, don't hold your breath. 

As a gift, Katie received Good Housekeepking's A Very Merry Christmas Cookbook. So far, we've tried several of the recipes and have been very impressed. And, there is still a lot more recipes we want to give a try. 

While thumbing through the cookbook I was immediately drawn to a photo of candied orange peel. The beautiful orange color was bright and cheerful. However, I had no intention of making the recipe because I didn't think I liked candied fruit. My only experience with candied fruit has been in fruitcake, and I'm NOT a fan. In fact, I rarely like any kind of little fruit pieces baked in something, especially raisins.*

A Threadless T-shirt—might have to go on next year's Christmas wish list.

Well somehow just before the holidays, we had amassed a huge pile of oranges, and no one was eating them. I stared at them on the counter wondering what to do with all of them. It was then I remembered the recipe for the candied orange peel. Along with the oranges, we had all the ingredients in the house (sugar and water). It was Saturday afternoon, and I had a few free hours, so I thought I'd give it a try. I was mainly making it for Katie because I figured neither I nor the kids would like it.

Just as I was finishing up, Katie and the kids came home. I got some pretty strange looks, especially from Katie who was wondering what I was up to. Although you're supposed to let the peel sit for 12 hours before eating, I gave everyone a taste. We were all amazed at how incredibly good the candied orange peel was. In fact, it wasn't long before that batch was gone, and I was making another. They can be addictive.

I decided to make candied orange peel as part of the Christmas culinary gifts I hand out to coworkers, and it was a hit.

This recipe is extremely easy and is one I'm sure our family will continue to make. However, I still doubt if I'll be chopping it up to bake in anything. That's still gross. But alone? Fantastic!

 *I did use the word "rarely" because dried cranberries in scones is one exception.

Caramel Cake with Browned Butter Frosting

One of the students I work with, Jeff, had a birthday a couple of months ago. Of course, I made a cake, and I even started a blog post back then with the recipe. However, I got a distracted and never got back to it. I guess you could really call that getting totally sidetracked. Oh, this poor neglected blog.

Well, today was a holiday, and I spent pretty much the entire day doing absolutely nothing. I was feeling slightly guilty and thought before I go to bed I wanted to do at least one productive thing. It was then I looked over at the computer and remembered this unfinished post.

Back on the day before Jeff's birthday, I remember thinking I wanted to try something other than chocolate. Now, that seems so strange to think I wasn't in the mood for chocolate, but oh well. I wondered if there was such a thing as a caramel cake. I looked through all my cookbooks to no avail. Next, I went online, and I found a caramel cake recipe from Maya Angelou's cookbook. As I read through the recipe, I noticed that it had the same browned butter frosting that goes on my favorite cookie in the world, sour cream cookies with browned butter frosting.  I seriously cannot control myself when these cookies are in vicinity. If Maya Angelou's cake might be in any way like these cookies, I thought should give it a try.

Sour cream cookies with browned butter frosting—If it weren't so late and I wouldn't have to go to the store to pick up some sour cream, I'd make me a batch right now. And, eat most of them.

The recipe calls for caramel syrup in the batter. You could make your own, but that was more trouble than I wanted, so I just went with a store bought jar of Mrs. Richardson's. The cake doesn't have a real strong caramel flavor, but it is really good. 

The cake was a big hit at the office, and it did taste a lot like the cookies. However, I must warn you. This cake is rather sweet and is best enjoyed in small slices—and not the big ol' honkin' pieces we Americans tend to usually serve.

Happy birthday, Jeff! Hope it was a good one.

The birthday boy with his cake

And, here we have Jeff. Why the goofy look? He "thinks" he's impersonating me. Personally, I don't get it and think he looks rather silly. I'm sure I have never been photographed making such a silly face with a dessert. (Is there such a thing as a sarcasm emoticon?)